Unless, of course, you filthy bugger, you favor the wenches and witches. Then, our sandal-footed friend, the Florida Renaissance Festival is your own personal strip club. Hit on Bertha by the jousting tournament. Challenge Brunhilda to a game of chess. (Loser takes off his codpiece.) Buy Hildegard a Scotch egg. Blow glass with Bronwyn. Basically, don your best tunic and show up to Quiet Waters Park (401 S. Powerline Road, Deerfield Beach) anytime between 10 a.m. and sundown this Sunday (or any weekend through March 14) and youll be up to your hosen in ladies who cant wait to come hither. Tickets cost $20, and, no, you cant barter for them with a homemade candle. Call 800-373-6337, or visit ren-fest.com.
Saturdays, Sundays, 10 a.m. Starts: Feb. 13. Continues through March 14, 2010