Grin as They Bare it

Who do you love more than your bartender? He’s there with an extra heavy hand when times are tough. He makes you look loved and charming to out of town guests – even if he doesn’t really know your name. And he nods and laughs at your “jokes” when you’re too intoxicated to form words with consonants. He’s the perfect man: Who wouldn’t want to get in his underwear? Well, tonight you can do nearly that at Bill’s Filling Station (1243 NE 11th Ave., Fort Lauderdale) and give to a wonderful cause during Bartenders: Boxers and Briefs.

Now pay attention because this affair might be the one occurrence when your detailed mental renderings will actually materialize in front of you in human form. Tonight, drink scientists parade around the bar in their manties so that you – loyal philanthropist – can dig deep in your pockets and bid on them. Now granted, you’re technically only bidding on the underwear: if you win, you take them home – but all dollars spent benefit Tuesday’s Angels, a local volunteer organization which gathers much-needed greenbacks for AIDS patients. Tuesday’s Angels is especially respected in the community because all of their funds raised go directly into the wallets of those who need them – not into business costs like rent, payroll, and the like.

So here’s how it works: hunky sorts from all the major gay bars in the area will be dawning their fanciest drawers. You and your friends salivate and then try furiously to outbid one another. To the victor go the spoils (which typically includes a little something extra besides the rhinestone thong, like a bar tab or dinner at whichever venue he represents). It’s for a good cause and there will be lots of nudity and 2-4-1 drink specials – so seriously, how can you consider going anywhere else? The stud parade begins at 9 p.m., there’s no cover but feel free to make a donation.

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Jamie Laughlin