Health Care Horror Show

Socialized medicine. Prescription drugs from Canada. Government-subsidized healthcare for children. If these don’t scare the living hell out of you, then we recommend that you head directly to Tradewinds Park and experience the Doctor’s Sanitarium. Produced by those sick -- yet lovable -- bastards Muncheez Entertainment, the Sanitarium is an expansive affair with three haunted houses, including a sequel to last year’s “Widow’s Lair” and, of course, the good Dr. Sandeski’s lab. You see, many years ago the doctor, who was quite mad, conducted horrible experiments on conscious patients, only to fatally gas them and himself before the authorities could intervene. Now he’s haunting the place and is understandably really pissed off. Wouldn’t you be? Especially considering what the doc’s probably paying for malpractice and med school loans. Beyond just scares, the Sanitarium will feature rides, fair food galore, a hayride, games, a gore makeover station (admit it, you’re just dying for a realistic-looking head wound), and a Little Haunts haunted house with tyke-sized terrors. The “kids eating their veggies” room is just awful, awful! Money raised benefits Special Olympics of Broward County. If chills and charity don’t make your Halloween, try arguing over a deductible with your primary care doctor; now that’s friggin’ scary.

The Sanitarium is located in Tradewinds Park (3600 W. Sample Rd., Coconut Creek, and is open from 6 to 11 p.m. Tickets range $17 to $22. Visit
Oct. 26-31, 6 p.m., 2007

KEEP NEW TIMES BROWARD-PALM BEACH FREE... Since we started New Times Broward-Palm Beach, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of South Florida, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Larry Carrino