We're getting close to the end, folks.
So far, you've gotten a taste of the slow-grinding, culo-clapping fiesta that is the South Florida rap game.
As we now lightly-tread the first half of the top ten, prepare for tremendo slow-grinding. We are the strip club capital after all.
Check the cut for numbers 10 to 6 in County Grind's 25 top South Florida rappers of all time.
10. DJ Laz
Style: Latin booty bass
Hands down, DJ Laz es el rey de Miami ("the king," for all you gringos). Young chongas insist the crown belongs to Armando Christian Pérez, a.k.a. Pitbull, but let's break it down on the real. Laz branded "Miami's Party Station," Power 96, and the lionized DJ Laz Morning Show catapulted the Pimp with a Limp to spearhead his own spot on the bi-coastal DJ 106.7. But those true to the Dade, white, and blue know Lazaro for "Oye Morena," his Latin horns-infused booty bass anthem. There isn't a quinceañera or a confirmation across county lines that won't end the night with his hip-thrusting mantra: un dos, un dos tres!
9. Vanilla Ice
Hometown: Fort Lauderdale/West Palm Beach
Style: Bowie-sampling, ICP lovin' breakdance-friendly tunes
Mr. Robert Matthew Van Winkle definitely pays homage to the 305 and 954 in "Ice Ice Baby" with that spiffy Hurricanes pullover and a solid singalong line about A1A and this gem: "Miami's on the scene just in case you didn't know it/My town, that created all the bass sound."
Rob set up a recording studio in Miami in the mid-'90s and opened an extreme sport store in town around the same time. Nowadays he's building homes in West Palm with The Vanilla Ice Project on the DIY Network, and appearing in hilarious roles, like playing himself in Adam Sandler's That's My Boy. You can pooh-pooh Vanilla Ice all you want as a corny white-dude rapper, but you know every freakin' word to "Ice, Ice Baby" and you love it.
8. DJ Uncle Al
Style: Peace-making Miami bass
Though Uncle Al lost his life to gun violence, his "peace in the hood" motto remains a force in youth gang violence prevention programs across the country. Liberty City even hosts an annual Peace In Da Hood festival in honor of the Miami bass pioneer. And any Miamian knows it's the point of no return when "It's Timmmmeeee, bass is gonna blow your mind" comes on at a party. Rest in peace, Uncle Al.
Hometown: Liberty City
Style: Rump-shaking feminist anthems
If you didn't catch Trina's drift on her 2000 Trick Daddy rump-shaker, "Pull Over," Miami's Diamond Princess has one thing on the ladies of hip-hop: a seriously fat ass. And because of her buffet-sized booty, the Magic City is the capital of "dumps in the truck," from the district lines of Westchester to Liberty City.
Since her debut, Da Baddest Bitch continues to dedicate tracks to her coveted booty meat (see her most recent, "Ass Fat"), but the monetary value of Trina's culo is revealed on her Rick Ross collab "Waist So Skinny." The Liberty City darling boasts, "I'm a boss, bitch, I stunt first class/I got insurance, on this boss ass." And sho 'nuf Trina is the true queen of Miami hip-hop as represented by her long heels with their red bottoms, and the fact that she can bone about five or six best friends, and we all still love her like no other.
All hail Queen Trina!
6. Uncle Luke (solo)
Hometown: Miami Beach
Style: Heavy shrieks (Cap D' comin'!) over booty bass
probably the only city where a former rap star with a discography that includes "Pre-Masterbatorial" and "Dick in Ya Mouth" can get away with running for mayor (our cojones are just that big). Luther Campbell, frontman of booty bass kings 2 Live Crew, did just that.
He lost, but Uncle Luke remains a prominent local figure, and regularly writes a New Times column on issues of race and politics. Plus, you cannot attend a party in the 305 without scrubbing the flo' to his seminal "It's Your Birthday." Now what's that number one zodiac sign?
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