If Rick Scott and the Elections Department ever let us cast our ballots, we'll be electing a president tomorrow. The wait to see what the "country" has decided, is torturous. It's like pissing on a pregnancy stick and nail biting till you see that blue or red.
Now, we're not endorsing anyone around here, but while Mittens has been campaigning full time, Obama's been running for office while still acting as prez. So, we thought we'd give him a little "the people care about you" post. Well, they care about you, and hate you post.
We know how much our president likes to sing at parties and that Michelle likes to Dougie, so we assembled a list of songs, both kind and cruel, dedicated to our current commander-in-chief.
10. Obama Girl "Crush on Obama"
This lady may be as fickle as a fish flip-flopping fish out of that water up there, but she managed to get her face and booty all up in our computer screens by pretending to love Barack four years back.
9. Sister Deborah's "Uncle Obama"
There is absolutely no way this song is about President Obama. Like no way. But if it were, Michelle, watch out! These lil' lady from Ghana want his banana. And Barack, be careful, cause she's gonna feed it to her monkey.
8. Hank Williams Jr's "Don't Tread on Me"
Williams Jr has compared our black president Barack to Hitler -- yes, that Adolf-- but here he's singing that he's got common sense on his side, and he's set on taking back his country. Back to the place where rape can be legitimate and preexisting conditions leave you paying out of pocket for medial care.
7. Young Jeezy's "My President" Featuring Nas
Wait, can you rewind that? Jezzy's voting for who? Couldn't figure it out.
He's so 'bamaed out, he's about to email Jesus about it!
6. Cocoa Tea's "Barack Obama"
This is actually one neat Obama jam. Play this one, and only this one, if Barack wins tomorrow.
5. Ray Stevens' Obama Nation
This guy thinks Obama's wiping his ass with the Constitution and sticking his paws in our personal bank accounts. Nothing like accusing the pres of being a socialist to get paranoids all fired up!
4. Stevie Wonder's "Keep Moving Forward"
Stevie is a god amongst men, but did he really think it was a good idea to use an "Eastern" type tune on this one? We kinda want to keep our president seeming local not foreign or Trump comes 'a callin'.
3. Nas' "Black President"
Bringing back Nas again, but every time you hear Tupac say, "We ain't ready to see a black president," don't you wanna cry?
2. Gotye parody "Obama That I Used to Know"
Nothing awesomer than a pasty white turd singing about not getting his shit together and blaming Barack. The rest of us were living with our moms before Obama, and now we have jobs.
Liz has her master’s degree in religion from Florida State University. She has since written for publications and outlets such as Miami New Times, Rolling Stone, Pitchfork, Ocean Drive, the Huffington Post, NBC Miami, Time Out Miami, Insomniac, the Daily Dot, and the Atlantic. Liz spent three years as New Times Broward-Palm Beach’s music editor, was the weekend news editor at Inverse, and is currently the managing editor at Tom Tom Magazine.