Nothin screams summer in South Florida like gettin naked in the ocean and doin' the wild thing.
Or drinking peach Schnapps mixed with vodka, orange, and cranberry, in a highball glass with ice.
Either way, it's one of the world's favorite provocative statements. Here are the ten best songs about sex on the beach.
10. The Beach Boys - "Barbara Anne"
Barbara Anne is a girl that the Beach Boys meet at a dance when they're looking for romance. They try Mary Lou, dance with Peggy Sue, but according to the song, "none of those'll do." So they take it to the sand with Barbara Anne, and run a train.
9. Spankers - "Sex On The Beach"
If Zoolander and the guys from Night At The Roxbury formed like Voltron to make one superdouche, and then produced a house track that could make a Buddhist temple booty dance, and then invited a couple of South American models to a dance party in a photo studio, and then brought out a camcorder, that would be exactly how this song and video came about. That's why it's got 5 million views.
8. Jamie Foxx - "Sex On The Beach"
Somewhere between working as Jim Carrey's DJ on In Living Color, and playing the U.S. president in a big budget Hollywood movie, Jamie Foxx made an album called Best Night Of My Life, with a song about meeting a Puerto Rican girl in a club on South Beach (JLo?), getting drunk, and doing it with her. He sings in autotune, and there's a feature from the Macintosh robot voice that says "If you're humping like I'm humping, put your hands in the air."
7. Diamond Style Productions - "Sex On The Beach"
William Shakespeare was reincarnated as daveth3king, a YouTube user with a propensity for uploading videos featuring girls with massive boobies as the freezeframe. His penmanship is unequalled in modern songwriting. From his latest hit: "Sex on the beach, ma, and I ain't talkin bout the drink, ma, let me get you in sync, ma, no boy band, wink wink, ma."
6. T-Spoon - "Sex On The Beach"
Woah, woah, woah, hey, WTF, hold up, why didn't TMZ ever report it when Ace Of Base got robbed. T-Spoon is like the bizarro world Caribbean version of the famous Swedish pop group. Great video though, they give new meaning to choreographed air humps and macarena breaks.
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5. Enchante - "Sex On The Beach"
There is a time and place for sex on ketamine, but it's usually not anywhere near the ocean. Have you ever tried swimming your way out of a K-hole? But somehow this syrup dripping track still manages to get the party going, even if it doesn't explain how to get the sand out of your butt crack.
4. Katy Perry feat Snoop Dogg - "California Gurls"
Drinking, partying, daisy dukes, bikini tops, Katy Perry lying on a pink cloud, almost naked.
3. Kevin Fowler - "Hell Yeah I Like Beer"
This country song uses the alcoholic beverage known as "sex on the beach" as a metaphor for everything that is lame, and promotes beer as a symbol for everything that's cool. An entire college women's studies dissertation could probably be written about it, and in the end, it would find the lyrics as empowering as funneling a quart of High Life in a Cracker Barrel parking lot after a minor league baseball game.
2. Wolfpack - "Sex On The Beach"
Before he was the famous, Lil B, The Based God, he was just another dog in the wolf pack. This song's core message of sex on the beach as a drink and as a an act of outdoor sex both reinforces and knocks down every stereotype associated with lame club music about stupid drinks.
1. Sugababes - "Easy"
And the award for best music video shot in a nightclub bathroom with girls you'd do coke with on a 72 hour bender goes to Sugababes. This song features lush production, and lyrics that would make Phil Spector cum in his pants such as "I want sex on the beach, and I don't mean on the rocks."
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