Bubba the Love Expunger

First of all, send the kids to Mama's room to watch television. Tailpipe is about to discuss some grown-up matters.

The 'Pipe is referring to sex — or at least what passes for sex on Bubba the Love Sponge's Sirius Satellite Radio show. It seems that on June 12, Bubba staged one of his patented on-air nude gropefests, with Brooke Skye as the headliner. Skye, Fort Lauderdale's own princess of porn, had appeared on the show twice before, but this was the first time she was confronted with a game-for-anything porn rival named Melissa Midwest wearing a ten-inch strap-on dildo.

The June 12 show has now resulted in a lawsuit brought by Skye — whose real name is Hope Miller — against Bubba, Melissa Midwest (really Melissa Harrington from Lincoln, Nebraska), Sirius, and a bunch of Bubba's staffers. Skye spokesman Boyce Olson told Tailpipe that his slim, girlish-looking 20-year-old client had been "violated" against her will during the show. She's asking for $15,000 or more from each of ten defendants.

When last Tailpipe heard from Skye, she was leading a fun-filled life in Fort Lauderdale, amply funded by revenues from her personal website. It was the SoFla vida loca, something like the WB network's Felicity if the central character were a sunny, fresh-faced porn star. Parties, dates, love affairs (in her private life, she told New Times last May, she dates men), even a few moments here and there for some creative thinking. In daily videocam appearances on her site, Skye disrobes, performs sex acts with other girls, and engages in e-mailed dialogue with her hundreds of subscribers. But as Wyatt Olson pointed out in his May cover story, "Dream Sluts," Skye's site is actually part of a new trend of porn going softer on the Internet. With her low-fat body, unenhanced by surgery, and her cheerleader smile, Skye is the paradigm for a new kind of porn star: the high school girlfriend that her male admirers always dreamed of.

Skye's real-life dates apparently never included men like Bubba. The Love Sponge was born Todd Clem, a longtime radio personality who's had numerous run-ins with the Federal Communications Commission and various radio stations. He was brought to Sirius by his pal Howard Stern, whose own outrageous shenanigans seem like breakfast with the queen compared to Bubba's antics (he once had a pig slaughtered during a broadcast).

In her complaint, Skye says that she was coerced into having sex with Midwest in a Sirius broadcast studio in Tampa. She says that before the show, she was plied with alcohol (though she was younger than the legal drinking age) and told that, if she didn't cooperate, Bubba would "kick your ass out of my studio and tell everybody not to visit the website..." Then she was directed to get it on with Midwest, who was strapped and ready to go.

Melissa Midwest brought a video cameraman to record the encounter, and the 'Pipe has seen an abridged version of the tape on the website uselessjunk.com. It's an embarrassing piece of street theater, with Bubba and staff members surrounding the two girls, wordlessly dodging in and out as the dildo seeks its mark. Bubba himself, a paunchy guy in baggy, oversized gym shorts, pursues the pair, barking instructions with a handheld mic.

In her complaint, Skye charges that Bubba's minions held her down while Melissa inserted the dildo, causing "injuries to her vaginal area." The paper says she yelled "ouch" and "indicated that... she did not want to participate in performing the act." Her lawyer, Minneapolis-based Steven H. Silton, says that Skye did not seek medical help after the show. "It had more to do with the fact that she was very traumatized by the incident," he told the 'Pipe.

Bubba's spokeswoman Elise Brown said that he and Sirius had no comment on the suit. Tailpipe tried to reach Midwest for her version but could not find her. On her own website, though, she said that, after examining the video, "I have counted 5-6 times during [it] that I asked Brooke if she was OK and how she was doing. I also said a number of times I will make sure to take my time and just tell me if there is any problem at all!"

It's hard for Tailpipe to assess what was really going on in that studio. Obviously, money had something to do with it. Both Skye and Midwest expressed anxiety about losing endorsements and links with other porn sites at the cost of revenues from web visits, merchandise sales, and new memberships. But it's also clear that Brooke Skye, every Internet weirdo's girlfriend, had gotten in way over her head.

"This had nothing to do with sex or eroticism," Silton says. "It was about coercion. He [Bubba] wanted to show that he could cross the line and make her do something she didn't want to do."

The 'Pipe sympathizes with the local girl, but he wishes Skye had just walked out rather than going along with Bubba's sick program for as long as she did.

This battered car part is going to have a cushion embroidered for Skye with a piece of homely wisdom: "When you lie down with creeps and predators, expect to get reamed."

Worst Week Ever

Last week was a bad one for Hollywood City Attorney Dan Abbott. Maybe not Mark Foley bad. And definitely not Cory Lidle bad. But pretty awful nonetheless.

Lost in all the furor over the indictment of Hollywood Commissioner Keith Wasserstrom on corruption charges — a result due partly to Abbott's misinterpreting Florida law — was the culmination of a six-day jury trial in which Abbott's office defended the Hollywood Police Department against charges of age discrimination brought by two sergeants. The jury returned its verdict October 10: The City of Hollywood must pay big time.

The jury found that the Hollywood P.D. had discriminated against Sgts. Frank Hogan and Michael Springstun, who were qualified in every way for promotion to lieutenant except for their age. Chief James Scarberry, it seems, had a thing against promoting sergeants older than 50.

The jury also found that Hogan and Springstun's superiors had retaliated against them for filing suit, giving them disparaging reviews and mysteriously unearthing a bunch of Internal Affairs complaints against them. The two officers also found themselves losing out on job assignments and overtime pay.

Oh, but now they'll be paid. Handsomely. For Hogan, who retired from the department a few weeks ago, $1,183,000. For Springstun, who can now afford to retire in comfort, $1,185,000. Abbott's office can still file an appeal, and this may be the reason that neither side was inclined to discuss the case.

Still, it goes to show that you don't have to be a condo developer or a sludge processor to get money from Hollywood City Hall. — As told to Edmund Newton

KEEP NEW TIMES BROWARD-PALM BEACH FREE... Since we started New Times Broward-Palm Beach, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of South Florida, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.