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Florida Bar's Guide to Being an Adult: "Why Can't I Drink at 18?"

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For those darling kids who just turned 18 and have no idea how to operate themselves, the Florida Bar is here to help. The smarty-pants lawyers have released an exquisitely worded pamphlet to guide the state's "new adults." In a mere 30 pages, the booklet addresses pressing questions such as:


"When Are You Under Arrest?"
"Is It True, a Seemingly Minor Action Would Be a Felony in Florida?"
"Why Can't I Drink at Age 18?"
"What Happens If I Drive After I Have Been Drinking?"
"What Are the Penalties for a Fake ID?"

Sadly, the answers are not nearly as fascinating as the questions, but there are a few gems. My favorite describes the "seemingly minor" actions that can result in felony charges, such as to "unlawfully spray a fire extinguisher, or falsely report child abuse."


This year, the bar says it has given out 184,000 of these helpful pamphlets to 771 public high schools in Florida. Hopefully, now that the kids are educated, they will never have to learn the real-life answers to questions such as "Can I Be Fired?" and "What if I Cannot Take Care of My Child?"

Welcome to adulthood, kiddos.

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Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in South Florida.