Whether it's ants in your pants, bugs in your rugs, or termites in your... Lucite? coffee table?... InfoGroup ORC released some unsurprising news this week: Florida has more bug problems than any other state, they found, after conducting a telephone survey of homeowners.
Ninety percent of homeowners reported fighting off insect infestations, with ants as the top culprit: Nearly 60 percent said ants were "very likely" or "somewhat likely" making residence in their homes. Just 27 percent said termites were a "likely" presence.
Having lived in West Palm since 1992, I can remember my share of ant colonies marching in the grooves between the kitchen floor tiles, so I put up a little challenge. How long would it take me to find a bug in my house?
My guess: 45 seconds. Cocky? Maybe. I started out in the bathroom, which has a door leading outside. As kids, my brother and I would avoid putting our feet on the floor when goin' potty, lest we come away with ant bites the size of golf balls. But even along the door, I didn't see a single insect.
Two minutes down the drain, I headed to the kitchen. Surely there were bugs in the kitchen, right? Wrong. There was a false alarm with some stray poppy seeds on the counter, but that's about it.
I headed into the foyer area, which has a window I've never looked at too closely because I was sure it was an insect apartment complex. Well, I did find a large fly, but it was dead. Still, I'm calling it quits at four minutes since, full disclosure, my AC is broken -- no wonder the bugs fled to my neighbors' homes. I wonder when they'll release a survey "discovering" Florida is the most insufferably hot state too.