Where else can you find the Air Force Thunderbirds, the Navy Hornets, the Coast Guard search-and-rescue team, and the Navy SEALs parachute team all gathered in one place? While liberals might dismiss this as a showy recruiting tool, a fossil-fuel-powered display of machismo, or an I-don't-wanna-know-how-costly waste of taxpayer dollars, the Fort Lauderdale Air & Sea Show is quite a mind-blowing spectacle. After a five-year hiatus, it returned in April. Throw in a lot of CGI effects and a little bit of plot and you've got yourself a blockbuster.

Flaunt is one of South Florida's longest-running dance parties. Housed in West Palm Beach's Respectable Street, Flaunt is the dance floor to hit to let loose, down a whole lot of booze, and forget about all your cares. The DJs spin the best of electro-dance and new wave, the bartenders serve heavy shots, and the crowd ain't so bad-looking either.

You've got on tight pants, and so does he. You're drinking PBR, and so is she. You both share a few flirty smiles on the dance floor as you booty-dance ironically to the "Tootsie Roll." It's hipster love at first sight. This type of love connection can occur only underneath the glittering chandelier at the Green Room at one of its various hipster dance nights during the week. Week after week, the too-cool-for-school 20-something crowd flocks to the dance floor at the Green Room to shake its hips to MGMT, the Faint, and Notorious B.I.G. — ironically, of course. Whether it's a Thursday night or Saturday night, the Green Room is the place to meet your fixed-gear bike-riding, PBR-drinking, tattooed dream lover.

Located out in our version of the west, in Davie, just off of State Road 84, Round Up offers South Florida country lovers a big ol' break from the bustle of electronic and booty music and a place to line up and show off their slick moves. You'll find gunslingers in cowboy boots and country girls in daisy dukes. Round Up's huge dance floor accommodates the regular twinkle toes and newcomers looking for a rollicking party. There's also a number of big-name country-friendly acts that stop through to perform, like Uncle Kracker. Come on; where else can you get bottle service and dance lessons all while dressed like John Wayne?

Each week at Digital Love Thursdays, the fashion-savvy indie dance crowd bounced, grinned, and threw back PBRs as DJs Mig and Sweetswirl served up just the right jams. Mixing tracks freshly picked out of the blogosphere with old-school classics, Mig and Sweetswirl never ceased to give the room the beat it needs: When it was time for a sing-along, a Smiths tune inevitably took over the room. When it was time for something new, a track from a local artist made its way into the mix. Always exciting and with a great feel for the room, the DJ duo were the right folks to have at the helm of the party. With Digital Love recently deceased, Mig and Sweetswirl's skills will now be lent to helping the booties shake on Saturday nights at Green Room instead.

The Green Room has taken downtown Fort Lauderdale and slapped it upside the head with good music and a helluva lotta dancing. The rise of hip-hop haven Brown Bag Wednesdays sweetens the tragic loss of the once-popular dance party Digital Love at the same spot. Sweetens it with quarts of Colt 45 and impromptu dance-offs. Not only do Brown Bag Wednesdays bring the malt liquor; they bring cozies that resemble brown bags. How's that for almost authentic? Kicking off this one-nighter — one that's demonstrated that it is constant with quality — was a DJ set and a bit of an off-the-cuff live performance by Talib Kweli. The night brings together the brightest rhymers from the tricounty area and some national acts like Dead Prez. For those who claim there's no hip-hop scene in South Florida, Brown Bag is taking you out to lunch and feeding you the delicious truth. We've got it, and we've got it good.

As the night winds down and the bars close, you're still drunk, you haven't blown all your cash, and you kind of wanna see some titties. Where do you go? You grab your thick-rimmed-glasses-wearing girlfriend and drag your tatted-up ass over to Scarlett's. Duh. Scarlett's not only has nude ladies dancing away way early into the morning but also free lunch. Sure, you're thinking, eating in a strip club is icky, but didn't you catch the part that it's free? The dancers are all nude, and you can even score a two-for-one dance. It's a couples-friendly joint, not high class but not sleazy, so maybe you get a dance for the lady friend too. No? The girls here are chill, so you don't feel pressured to let it rain your entire income on their nude booties. Just sit back, grab a glass of booze, and enjoy the show.

Throw out everything you knew about pub quizzes and bands of cardiganed hipsters competing rabidly to nail a question on a technicality. In fact, don't call this light-beer-fueled questionfest a "pub quiz" at all. It's Trivia Night, plain and simple, and it goes down every Wednesday at 8 p.m. Your down-to-earth and occasionally lewd hosts, Dawn and Ken, holler out questions between loud plays of all the crappy songs you love. Be warned, though, that when the stakes get high, she'll trick you: "Uganda... is not the correct answer!" As for the bar, it's smoker-friendly (so bring your disgusting friends along), and the burgers and wings are decent. It's a sports bar owned by Packers fans, and it's full of TVs, so you just might decide to stick around to watch a game (or, as happened this year, one of the Trivia Night regulars competing on Jeopardy).

Whether you're into Mr. Universe types or prefer cherub-faced boys who look like they ought to be at home studying for an algebra test, a trip to Boardwalk on the right night will have you tingling below the belt. Show up on Wednesday for the "new meat amateur" contest or on Friday and Saturday for "packed porn star weekends," hosted by the delightfully entertaining Tiffany Arieagus and Misty Eyes. Boardwalk welcomes special visits from famously hung fellows like the Broke Straight Boys and boasts resident studs as well, like 21-year-old Cuban twins Arielle and George. One night with the oiled-up studs at Boardwalk and you're likely to realize that it would take a long (ahem), hard search to find a better spot to stuff bulging banana hammocks with stiff dollar bills.

For more than two decades, Rob Van Winkle has been the butt of jokes and the subject of parody. But the man responsible for the 1991 Grammy-nominated "Ice Ice Baby" has surged back to relevancy in recent years by branding himself as a fun-loving, dirt-bike-jumping, bong-ripping renegade of home renovation. When his music career hit a lull, he stacked cash by buying homes on the cheap, fancying them up, and then flipping them. That eventually became the premise of his award-winning reality show, The Vanilla Ice Project, which the DIY Network renewed earlier this year for a third season. B-list success begets B-list success. In recent months, he has been a judge on Canada Sings, worked his way into a feud between WWE's the Rock and John Cena, performed at halftime of a Minnesota Timberwolves game, and gone back to the studio — albeit with Psychopathic Records and the Insane Clown Posse. He's living the American juggalo dream.

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