Holidays

IKEA vs. Apple Store: Which Is the More Hellish Shopping Experience?

If you combined The Purge with Jingle All the Way, you'd not only have a very dead Sinbad -- let's face it, he'd be the first to go -- you'd have Black Friday.

And as thousands of bloated Americans finish their last slice of pumpkin pie with a sticky fork, thousands more will be finishing the elderly lady who jumped in between them and the last iPad with a rear naked choke.

See also: The Six Worst Places in Broward

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Ryan Pfeffer is Miami New Times’ music editor. After earning a BS in editing, writing, and media from Florida State University, Ryan joined the New Times staff in November 2013 as a web editor, where he coined the phrase "pee-tweet" (to retweet someone while urinating). Born and raised in Fort Lauderdale, he’s now neck-deep in bass and booty in the 305.
Contact: Ryan Pfeffer