Ethical Eating

I'm Eating What?! Chocolate Sapote

​Yes, we know what it looks like. And, yes, we ate it, anyhow. Fortunately it didn't taste like that. Not even close. Yet the experience of devouring this strange fruit was something akin to losing our virginity.

We found this chocolate sapote at a farmer's market and thought

that it was worth a buck to try anything with chocolate in its name. The

farmer who grew the thing said it was a great item to sneak into a

kid's diet since it has amazing nutritional value and looks yummy when

mixed into whatever--oatmeal, peanut butter sandwiches, etcetera...

(Okay, so he never actually said "etcetera," but you get the idea). We

don't have kids, but we act like them, so our consumption was


Anyhow by the time we made it home

the thing was nearly downright squishy, its green skin looking as if it

got sacked by a defensive end one too many times. So we threw it in the

fridge and waited until morning.

The sun rose and we excitedly took our fruity friend out to find it now cold, but still squishy. It emitted virtually no scent, either, so onward with our study. We tore into the skin and were pleasantly surprised to find it was just as chocolately brown as we hoped though, in retrospect, we wondered what other color it possibly could've turned. 

Upon careful dissection we came across six substantially large reddish-brown seeds which resembled the shape of small garlic cloves and set those aside for later inspection. Then we dug into the flesh, squeezing it from the skin then licking the remnants off our digits and sucking and licking the skin of all the little bits. Dare we admit how sensual this experience was? 

True this specimen lacked the tang of a passionfruit's core, the yield of an apple's skin when pierced by an incisor, and the liquid response of a Royal Riviera pear consumed right at it's peak, but if fruit could appear in a sexy competition, we dare say this chocolate sapote is a contender for the crown. 

It really doesn't have much taste, just a slight sweetness and a beautiful custardy texture. And, yes, it does resemble chocolate when mixed in with a bowl of oatmeal (see Exhibit A for proof), but don't count on this fruit to deliver any spike of flavor. It reminded us of chocolate pudding, just light on the chocolate and sugar.
As to whom should eat this, that's easy: anyone who hasn't gotten laid in a while. You'll get the same spike of sensual satisfaction without having to buy anyone dinner and the cleanup after exploration is much, much easier.

KEEP NEW TIMES BROWARD-PALM BEACH FREE... Since we started New Times Broward-Palm Beach, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of South Florida, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Riki Altman