The Five Least Romantic Places in Fort Lauderdale

Oh, Cupid. You're the only tiny man in a diaper besides our grandfather who can inspire us to love. But once a year, unlike our grandfather (I sincerely hope), you torture us with pointy objects.

On February 14, without fail, we wake with a poke, and there you are, standing above us holding your arrow and grinning like a lunatic (again, the similarities between Cupid and your grandfather should have ended by now).

See also: The Best Things to Do on Valentine's Day in Broward and Palm Beach Counties

You yank off the covers, pull us from our warm beds, and shove us out into the cold, where we will inevitably be reminded of what a loveless existence we live.

But, what if Valentine's Day didn't have to be sad?

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Ryan Pfeffer is Miami New Times’ music editor. After earning a BS in editing, writing, and media from Florida State University, Ryan joined the New Times staff in November 2013 as a web editor, where he coined the phrase "pee-tweet" (to retweet someone while urinating). Born and raised in Fort Lauderdale, he’s now neck-deep in bass and booty in the 305.
Contact: Ryan Pfeffer