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Four Loko May Be Gone, But Have You Tried Cocaine?

​With all the fuss about the energy drink Four Loko going and getting itself banned (because it gave drinkers a speedy, caffeinated high that's been likened to cocaine) it's surprising we haven't heard more outcry against the energy drink that's actually called Cocaine. (Except for that little incident in Oklahoma.)

Available at a convenience store near you, Cocaine is actually marketed as an energy boost for athletes. 


Which isn't at all what FourLoko was about. That drink, which tasted like Bubblicious steeped in cheap vodka, was strictly about getting completely shit-faced


Though highly hopped-up on caffeine and packing 750 grams of taurine like most energy drinks, Cocaine contains no alcohol. It does, though, have this message on the can: "WARNING: This message is for the people who are too stupid to recognize the obvious. This product does not contain cocaine(duh). This product is not intended to be an alternative to an illicit street drug, and anyone who thinks otherwise is an idiot."

Although Cocaine hasn't taken off in popularity quite like Red Bull, at least one bartender has managed to make a cocktail with it: the Devil's Advocate.


On the Cocaine website sits this helpful hint: "Cocaine is a hell of a drug! If you get addicted and need help, call Narconon."

Will do.

Follow Clean Plate Charlie on Twitter: @CleanPlateBPB.

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