Hietalahti, friends and owners of One Eyed Spirits. Both Laune and Hietalaht,
Finland natives, were in the ad business before leaving the industry to
start a rum company with The Guinness Book of World Records holder for
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the
most appearances in adult films.
"Ron actually means rum in
Spanish," they told me smiling, as customers sampled shots poured by a
big-breasted blonde in a skin-tight dress. "It made sense to go with
him."
Admittedly, I was hesitant to try any liquid branding the name of
someone who ejaculates for a living. And the promotional flier, "Meet
the legend. Taste his rum," didn't help to ease my concern of what
exactly his rum was. But after some coercion, I tried
the smooth, Panamanian spirit. Aged for seven years, it has
a surprisingly good amount of spice and flavor for something sporting the face of a
man who's starred in films like, "Blowjob Adventures of Dr. Fellatio" and "Generally Horny Hospital." It wasn't all that bad.
The spiced rum, in a longer, slimmer bottle, isn't yet available in the
country, but it should be in stores with the aged rum in the coming weeks.
"People are really enjoying the spiced version," said Hietalahti. And when
asked why I should switch to theirs over my normal choice, Captain
Morgan, Laune reminded me, "Captain Morgan has one leg, Ron de Jeremy
has three."
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