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Blackmailing Bartender Slain by Lifeguard at the Dive Bar

Steely Dan echoed in the dimly lit bar as patrons took advantage of the $2 whiskey drinks. No one could predict that this Tuesday night at The Dive Bar would end in murder. And then a $250 cash prize to the person who solved it.

Unless they read the flyer of course.

Over charcuterie, cupcakes, and those $2 whiskey drinks, the staff and patrons alike costumed themselves in their finest resort wear and channeled their inner detective to take part in the joint's first murder mystery night.

See also: Someone Is Going to Die at the Dive Bar Tonight

Set in the fictional beachside resort, Maragaritaland, the Dive Bar was decked in ocean trinkets for the night. Upon entering the bar, patrons were inducted into the game with Hawaiian leis.

Beginning with an awkward start, confused patrons were unsure who was acting and who wasn't. The staff at the Dive Bar were all characters in the twisted plot, but fittingly so: The Dive Bar's server who flitted around the joint taking orders all night, played the fictional Kylie Cocktail, the cocktail waitress. The Dive Bar's bartender mixed drinks behind the bar as he played the fictional Jack Daniels, the bartender who would later die.

They did this all while divulging pieces of the puzzle that patrons tried to put together.

To those that had never been to the Dive Bar, it was unclear, and for precautionary measures, everyone was suspicious of everyone. Balancing my reporter's notepad, and a camera, and asking guests for quotes, quite a few pegged me for killer, even after I explained I was only observing.

"That's what they want us think, right? I bet you are the murderer," one guest told me apprehensively.

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Jess Swanson is a staff writer at New Times. Born and raised in Miami, she graduated from the University of Miami’s School of Communication and wrote briefly for the student newspaper until realizing her true calling: pissing off fraternity brothers by reporting about their parties on her crime blog. Especially gifted in jumping rope and solving Rubik’s cubes, she also holds the title for longest stint as an unpaid intern in New Times history. She left the Magic City for New York to earn her master’s degree from Columbia University School of Journalism, where she spent a year profiling circumcised men who were trying to regrow their foreskins for a story that ultimately won the John Horgan Award for Critical Science Journalism. Terrified by pizza rats and arctic temperatures, she quickly returned to her natural habitat.
Contact: Jess Swanson

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