The sign on the wall at Mauro's says, "NO KNIVES, NO FORKS, NO CUPS, NO ICE, NO CHEESE, NO PARMESAN, DON'T ASK," and it's translated into Spanish just so everyone gets the message. Other signs warn patrons "Prices are subject to change instantly" and "If you are rude, impatient, miserable, or annoying, there will be a $10 charge." Nothing like a little atmosphere. When you step into the long, narrow pizza parlor, all you'll see is scribbled-on dollar bills stuck to the wall with packing tape, an arsenal of pizza ovens, pizza boxes stacked to infinity, and a cooler full of domestic beer. Oh, you expected a menu? When you see the big-bellied pizza cooks in their white T-shirts and the tiny counter girls in tight jeans — all identifiable by matching scowls — you may opt to keep your mouth shut about that. Do ya think they offer broccoli rabe in this joint, Biff? When you get your piping-hot, giant slice — cheese goes for $2.50, and it's cash only — you will understand why this New York-style pizza, with its sheets of creamy mozzarella, its sweet but tangy sauce, its crust of perfection, has saved the lives of millions who roam from bar to bar on Hollywood Boulevard. Wash that thought down with a soda — sold only by the can. Now scram!